Expert Advice
As a wedding professional, Del Edwards – Weddingdells offers expert advice to help couples plan their perfect day. Below are some of the questions from brides and grooms. If you have a question, feel free to contact Del on del@weddingdells.com.au
Can we do funny vows?
YES! What a hoot! After you say the minimum legal words required, as set out in the Marriage Act, you can say anything you like! Here is a sample: "I call upon the people, here present to witness, that I, RICHARD, take you, JANE, to be my wedded wife. From this day forward I promise to be worth it. Worth the time, worth the trip, worth the energy, worth the embarrassment, worth your love. I promise that you will always count. You will always come first, and of course, if you don't come first (for whatever reason) I will buy you shoes." LOL
How does a celebrant work? What is the process and what should we expect from a Celebrant when choosing the right one?
If you are not going to get married in a Church, you will need a Commonwealth Registered Marriage Celebrant to conduct your wedding ceremony. When choosing your Celebrant, you should look for:
(a) Someone who knows what they are doing. A Celebrant's role is to make sure your marriage is a valid one and to address all the legal requirements of the wedding ceremony. This means helping you complete all the legal documents, lodging the documents with the appropriate authorities, registering your marriage and ensuring the correct words are said during the ceremony. A Celebrant can marry you anywhere in Australia; your home, a venue, a park, a boat etc. Ask how many ceremonies they have done?
(b) Someone who is willing to work with you, not dictate to you. Some brides and grooms know exactly what they want and some arrive 'fresh' and knowing very little about the process. A Celebrant will ask a lot of questions about you both, present you with a lot of different options and discuss the things you want (or don't want) to include in your ceremony. Together you will create a ceremony that reflects your personalities, something that will delight you and your guests.
(c) Someone who is friendly. You should find a Celebrant who you like, someone who you feel comfortable with. Ask a lot of questions to see if they are your kind of person. Ask what they love about being a Celebrant?
(d) Someone who is professional. Everyone's idea of a professional is different, however, I would ensure that the Celebrant has all the right equipment and insurances, will offer you a draft ceremony that you can edit, offers a rehearsal, will maintain contact with you throughout the journey to your wedding day. If you have seen the Celebrant in action, that's a bonus, however, you could ask for videos or read testimonials about the Celebrant, not only on the Celebrant's website, but on Facebook or Instagram.
Groom doesn't want to make a speech, what do I do?
My Groom is terrified of making a speech at our wedding and has therefore refused to do so. And I highly doubt the best man will also. The maid of honor is also scared of public speaking but is happy to overcome her fear to say a little something. Suggestions to even things out?
Public speaking just isn't for everyone. The older generation may say that a speech by the groom is tradition and everyone will expect it but nowadays, weddings are more about the couple in love and the way they want to do things.
(1) You could ask someone outside the wedding party to step in and take the groom's place for this part of the ceremony. Not only could you make great fun out of this, but why not give the task to someone who will actually enjoy speaking in front of your guests.
(2) Both of you could pre-record a speech or even film it. This way, you could keep it relaxed and personal or you could make a big production out of it with location shots, props, pie-charts and music.
(3) You could have your speech printed and framed on each table for the guests to read or even have the speech in an envelope under each guest's plate. Whether the speeches happen or not, it doesn't matter. What matters is you are married and happy and you get to enjoy your wedding day together.
What documents do I need?
You'll need to show your Celebrant a passport or birth certificate + some photo ID. However, if you've been married before, you will also need to provide evidence of how that marriage ended e.g. Divorce papers or a Death Certificate. If you have changed your name, you will need to provide evidence e.g. Change of Name Certificate or Deed Poll documents.
I only speak English, so if any of your personal documents/certificates are in an alphabet other than English, they need to be translated by an accredited Translator. The National Accreditation Authority for Translators & Interpreters Ltd (NAATI) is the national standards and accreditation body for translators and interpreters in Australia. Their website is www.naati.com.au.
*Remember: Unless the Celebrant performing the Marriage Ceremony has sighted all necessary documentation prior to commencing the formal proceedings, the marriage cannot be officiated.
My partner doesn't speak English, what do I need to do?
If the Bride, Groom or either witness does not speak English well enough to understand the legal parts of the Ceremony, you are required to provide an Interpreter who can translate for the non-English speaking persons. Interpreters can be found on the NAATI website (www.naati.com.au), however, you can also have a friend or an associate to translate for you. The person interpreting will be required to sign a Statutory Declaration before and after the ceremony, declaring that they have faithfully and honestly translated from English to the other language and back again.
*Remember: Any fee associated with the provision of an Interpreter is the responsibility of the Bride and Groom.
Who can be a witness?
Any two people who are willing to witness your entire wedding ceremony and who are at least 18 years of age! It can be mum and dad, or your grandparents, the best man and MOH, or perhaps a friend who didn't make it into the bridal party (but you still want to involve them in your ceremony). A witness is required to faithfully hear and understand your marriage vows and they will sign all three Marriage Certificates during the ceremony. They do not need to be Australian residents, however, if they cannot understand English, you will need to employ an interpreter.
How long is a ceremony?
It's really up to you. The Groom always wants it over quickly (LOL) and, if that's what you want, I can perform a 10-15 minute ceremony that ticks all the legal boxes, but also gives you something sweet to cherish. Most often, however, a ceremony lasts between 20-30 minutes depending on how much content there is in your chosen vows, readings and perhaps a symbolic rituals, e.g. Handfasting, wine ceremony or a sand ceremony etc.
How do I change my name after marriage?
You will need to obtain the Official Standard Marriage Certificate from The Registry of Births Deaths & Marriages. If your marriage was held in NSW, I can order this for you, or you can order it yourself any time after your marriage, either in person at a Service NSW Centre or online. For NSW residents, once the Official Standard Marriage Certificate is posted out to you, take it (and your old driver's license) to a Service NSW Centre and apply for a new driver's license in your married name. The new license will be free, it will have the same expiry date as your old driver's license.
Changing your passport into your married name is also free if you apply within 12 months of your marriage AND you have at least two years validity left on your current passport. Simply take the Official Marriage Certificate and identification paperwork to the post office or go online.
*Note: When using the Official Standard Marriage Certificate, either party can change their name into that of their spouse at no cost. You can also double barrel your surnames or hyphenate them. You cannot, however, create a whole new surname that is a mixture of both your names; that will require a Change Of Name Certificate and there will be a cost involved, e.g. Brown marrying Taylor can be Taylor-Brown, but it cannot be Taybro or Gigglebottom.
What are the legal requirements to be able to marry in Australia?
To be legally married in Australia, a person must:
- not be married to someone else
- not be marrying a parent, grandparent, child, grandchild, brother or sister (even adopted)
- be at least 18 years old (unless a court has approved a marriage where one party is aged between 16 and 18 years old)
- understand what marriage means and freely consent to marrying
- use specific words during the ceremony
- provide the necessary identification documents
- give written notice of their intention to marry to their authorised celebrant, at least one full calendar month before the wedding ceremony*
You don't need to be an Australian resident or an Australian citizen. You can marry while you are visiting from another country.
*Note: In certain circumstances, this period can be shortened if approved by the Court.